love, marriage and heidi klum

I feel like you guys really miss out when you’re not on my Facebook, because I’m generally pretty brilliant on there.  Now, I know, it’s not the coolest thing out there and many people have sworn off the Facebook for some seriously good reasons.  It’s just…well, I’m lazy.  And that’s the one place I can post pics of the kids for the grandparents and not have to email 14 people separately.  When every single side of your family has been divorced at least once, there’s a lot of freaking people to send this crap too.  Plus, most of the people I know are still facebooking it up and it’s just EASY.

Also, I haven’t been in a writing mood lately.  But whenever I feel a little snarky and want to get something out there, I can put it on FB and it only takes about a sentence and I feel better and you get a chuckle.  Or another reason to add me to your church’s prayer chain.  So…for those of you that swear off the book of faces, here’s what you’ve been missing:

Jimmie has decided he somehow has a shot with Heidi Klum.  {side note: that man’s laminated list grows longer every day.  should I be concerned?}  Anywho, he informs me this morning that Heidi Klum is back on the market.  {another side note: he did this as I was walking from the shower to the bed. Why was I doing this? You figure it out.  SO, not the best time to be bringing up Heidi Klum’s availability.  I digress…}

Jimmie: “I just want you to know Heidi Klum is back on the market.”
Me: *rolls eyes*
Jimmie: “Well she is. And I know I’m sexier than Seal. He looks like he’s been through a meat grinder.”
Me: “oh god.”

I gotta say, I really can’t disagree here.  That Seal is not a pretty fella.  However, I think Jimmie may be a bit deluded himself. (shh.)

Also, we recently survived “snowmageddon” of the Pacific Northwest.  Actually, I think our area was the only one really hit very hard, but we had a couple of days of snow followed by a few days of ice that nearly killed us.  The Seattle area does not handle snow.  There’s no real plowing system and this joint is full of hills and crazy people who only see sunshine every third month for approximately 14 hours.  It’s just not really a good place for snow to fall.  And then, when there’s freezing rain and ice storms which cause the trees to topple over onto power lines and we dark dwellers lose electricity to boot, it’s just no bueno.  Three days in the dark will make you crazy.  We loaded up and went to the in-laws since they have a generator, but it was still an ugly mess and I’m still recovering, mentally and emotionally.  And in the laundry department.  Holy shit I got behind.

To add to the fun, Jimmie quit tobacco (which in this case might as well have been crack for all the withdrawal issues) and I quit caffeine.  During snowmageddon.  Shit got real, folks.  Shit got really real.

I swear to you I thought we had reached that point in marriage where someone was going to have to go.  I mean, we are seriously committed to NO divorce.  We’re both from broken families, and we will kill each other before we do that to our kids.  But, for about two weeks, I really thought maybe I was fooling myself into thinking that was a possibility.  Don’t worry, we talked it out and some serious coming to know jesus was done.  And now he is back on track.   Uhhh… I mean, we are back on track. 😉

Unless, of course, that whole Heidi Klum thing works out for him.  And then? Well, just send really good alimony, pal.

Advertisements

10 thoughts on “love, marriage and heidi klum

  1. I know it’s weird, but I find Seal strangely sexy.

    Also, Jay’s been off cigarettes for about 4 weeks now. I’m so proud. Also, FB is awesome, but blogging is better. Just do it.

    • YOU’RE THE ONE! This morning Jim was all “why do women find him so sexy anyway?” And I was like “WHA? Who the hell finds HIM sexy? That’s just asinine!” I guess I was wrong. You find him sexy. 😉

      I know, I have missed my blog. I will get back into the swing of things. Except now I’m in full on tax mode. God I hate taxes!

      • And YAY, Jay! I bet he wasn’t nearly as hard to live with as Jim. God that man is a huge baby. 🙂
        (Actually, they say chewing tobacco is up there with heroin in the withdrawal department so I guess I’ll cut him some slack.)

  2. so glad to hear from you again…i was wondering where you went!! love the story about jimmy and heidi klum…thinkin’ he has some kind of chance with her now that she is free!! and i agree – seal is not hot in any sort of way. ohh – and if jim thinks it is good to bring up heidi klum while in the middle of what it sounds like you were doing…that just isn’t fair to anyone:)

  3. In honor of this post, I signed back into facebook for the first time in 15 months. I heard they finally added permanent account deletion instead of just “deactivation.” I quickly navigated to the appropriate page, ignoring the 135 messages it said were in my inbox and deleted my account. Forever. And ever. Amen.

  4. It’s probably not something you’d be interested in anyway. It’s like window shopping, reading a cookbook, rifling through someone’s closet and watching DIY shows all day long.
    It’s like my crack.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s